PHANTOMHIVE

Again by Yui

2010-01-16T07:23:00.000-08:00

Again by Yui
Opening song (1st) for the anime Fullmetal Alchemist Brotherhood

Kanji

梦の続き　追(お)いかけていたはずなのに
曲(ま)がりくねった
细(ほそ)い道　人につまずく
あの顷にみたいにって　戻(もど)りたい訳(わけ)じゃないの
なくしてきた空を　探してる
わかってくれますように
犠牲(ぎせい)になったように　悲しい颜はやめてよ
罪(つみ)の最后は涙じゃないよ
ずっと苦しく背负(せお)ってくんだ
出口(でぐち)见えない感情迷路(かんじょうめいろ)に
谁を待ってるの
白いノートに缀(つづ)ったように
もっと素直に吐(は)き出(だ)したいよ
何から　逃(のが)れたいんだ
……现実ってやつか?
叶えるために　生きてるんだって
忘れちゃいそうな　夜の真(ま)ん中
无难(ぶなん)になんて　やってらんないから
……帰る场所もないの
この想いを　消してしまうには
まだ人生长いでしょ　(I’m on the way)
懐(なつ)かしくなる
こんな痛みも歓迎(かんげい)じゃん
谢(あやま)らなくちゃいけないよね　ああ　ごめんね
うまく言えなくて　心配かけたままだったね
あの日抱(かか)えた全部　明日抱(かか)える全部
顺番(じゅんばん)つけたりはしないから
わかってくれますように
そっと目を闭じたんだ　
见たくないものまで见えんだもん
いらない噂(うわさ)にちょっと
初めて闻く発言(へつげん)どっち
向かい合ったら友达だって　嘘はやめてね
深(ふか)いハートが苛立(いらだ)つように
体(からだ)ん中燃(も)えているんだ
本当は期待してんの
……现実ってやつか？
叶えるために　生きてるんだって
叫(さけ)びたくなるよ　闻こえていますか？
无难(ぶなん)になんて　やってられないから
……帰る场所もないの
优しさには　いつも感谢してる
だから强くなりたい　(I’m on the way)
进(すす)むために
敌(てき)も味方(みかた)も歓迎(かんげい)じゃん
どうやって次(つぎ)のドア开(あ)けるんだっけ　考えてる
もう引(ひ)き返(かえ)せない物语(ものがたろ)始まってるんだ
目を覚ませ　目を覚ませ
この想いを　消してしまうには
まだ人生长いでしょ
やり残(のこ)してること　やり直してみたいから
もう一度行こうか
叶えるために　生きてるんだって
叫(さけ)びたくなるよ　闻こえていますか
无难(ぶなん)になんて　やってらんないから
……帰る场所もないの
优しさには　いつも感谢してる
だから强くなりたい　(I’m on the way)
懐(なつ)かしくなる
こんな痛みも歓迎(かんげい)じゃん

Romaji

yume no tsuduki
oikaketeita hazu nano ni
magari kunetta hosoimichi
nin ni tsumazuku
ano koroni mitai nitte
modoritai wake janai no
nakushi tekita sora wo
sagashiteru
wakatte kuremasu youni
gisei ninatta youni kanashii kao hayameteyo

tsumi no saigo ha namida janaiyo
zutto kurushi ku seotte kunda
deguchi mie nai kanjou meiro ni
dare wo matte rono
shiroi no-to ni tsuzutta youni
motto sunao ni haki dashi taiyo
nanika ra nogare tainda
genjitsu teyatsuka?

kanae rutameni iki terun datte
wasure chaisouna yoru no manaka
bunan ni nante yatteran naikara
… … kaeru basho monaino
kono omoi wo keshi teshimauniha
mada jinsei nagai desho? ( I’m on the way)

natsu kashi kunaru
konna ita mimo kangei jan

ayamara nakuchai kenaiyone
Aa gomenne
umaku ie nakute shinpai kaketa mama dattane
ano nichi kaeta zenbu
ashita kae ru zenbu
junban tsuketari ha shinaikara
wakatte kuremasu youni
sotto me wo toji tanda
mita kunaimonomade miendamon

iranai uwasa nichotto
hajimete kiku hetsugen docchi
mukai atta ra tomodachi datte
uso haya metene
fukai ha-to ga iradatsu youni
karada n naka moete irunda
hontou ha kitaishi tenno
… … genjitsu tteyatsuka?

kanae rutameni iki terundatte
sakebi takunaruyo kiko etei masuka?
bunan ninante yatte rarenaikara
… …kaeru basho monaino
yasashi saniha itsumo kanshashi teru
dakara tsuyoku naritai ( I’m on the way)

susumu tameni
teki mo mikata mo kangei jan
douyatte tsugino doa ake rundakke kangae teru
mou hiki kaese nai monogataro hajima tterunda

me wo sama se me wo sama se

kono omoi wo keshi teshimauniha
mada jinsei nagai desho?

yari nokoshi terukoto
yari naoshi temitaikara

mou ichido iko uka
kanae rutameni iki terundatte
sakebita kunaruyo kiko eteimasuka
bunan ninante yatteran naikara
… … kaeru basho monaino
yasashisaniha itsumo kanshashi teru
dakara tsuyoku naritai ( I’m on the way )
natsukashi kunaru
konna ita mimo kangei jan

Chinese Translation (中文翻译)

梦的待续本应继续追寻
这条曲折窄小的道路容易使人跌倒
其实并不想再回到像那个时候一样
只是为了寻找那片已经失去了的天空而已
请慢慢地开始理解吧别再露出那如同受害者般的悲伤的样子
罪孽的最后并不是落泪啊而是要一直都背负着痛苦
在看不到出口的感情迷宫中在等待着谁？
像在白色的笔记上书写一样本想更加坦率的说出来
可是在逃避什么呢是现实吗?
为了实现愿望而生存下去
想已忘却了一般在深夜的中心里
不会找理由逃避的 … …已经无路可退了
在这份思念消失之前人生还很漫长吧？
如此怀念的这种痛为何不受欢迎呢？
不得不道歉呢啊啊对不起了
虽然不能很好地表达让你一直都挂心呢
那一天所担负的全部明天将要所担负的全部
是不会一一顺序的
请慢慢地开始理解吧只要轻轻地闭上眼
不想看到的东西就会看不到了
不需要的流言最初听到的是哪个?
见面两次就是朋友了不要再说这种谎言了
赤红的心急不可耐全身都像被燃烧起来一样
真正地期待着的 … …难道是现实?
为了实现愿望而生存下去
想要放声大喊出来是否能听见呢
不会找理由逃避的 … …已经无路可退了
对你的温柔我一直都很感激因此想要变得更强
为了能继续前进无论敌人还是伙伴都同样欢迎
要怎样才能打开下一道门呢考虑了吗?
已经无法回去了故事已经开始了
觉醒吧觉醒吧
在这份思念消失之前人生还很漫长吧？
未能完成的事情还想重新再来一次
再一次开始吧
为了实现愿望而生存下去
想要放声大喊出来是否能听见呢
不会找理由逃避的 … …已经无路可退了
对你的温柔我一直都很感激因此想要变得更强
如此怀念的这种痛为何不受欢迎呢？

English Translation

I should have been chasing the continuation of my dream,
but I got distracted by the people on this thin winding road.
It’s not that I want to go back to the days of back then,
I’m just searching for the sky I’ve lost…
Please understand.
Stop showing that sad and victimized-looking face…
Tears are not the end of crime…
they’re the painful reminder of it…
I can’t see the exit of this sensitive maze,
who am I wating for?
Like the writing in my white notebook,
I want to bring out my honest self.
What was I running from?
…from reality?
To make my wish come true,
I’ll contine living,
it seems I’ll forget everything within the center of the night,
but I won’t make a reason to escape.
…There isn’t a place to go back to…
I’ll erase this feeling…
I still have a long life don’t I?
I’m missing the feeling…
so this pain is also welcomed!
I must apologize…
Aa, I’m sorry…
I can’t say it clearly,
I’ve always made you worry haven’t I?
Back then you accepted everything,
and in the future, you’ll accept everything.
I won’t make a waiting list…
Please understand.
I gently closed my eyes
and I couldn’t even see the things
I didn’t want to see.
From the useless rumors,
which one was it that I heard of first?
“We were friends after the second meeting”??
Stop lying…
My red heart irritated me,
it burned up my whole body.
Truth is…
I had some hope…
…from reality?
To make my wish come true,
I’ll continue living,
I want to scream out…
can you hear me?
I won’t make a reason to escape.
…There isn’t a place to go back to…
I’m thankful for your kindness,
that’s why I want to be stronger.
To continue forward,
I welcome both enemies and allies.
How do I open the next door?
Are you thinking of a way?
We can’t go back again,
the story has already started.
Be Awake Be Awake
I’ll erase this feeling…
I still have a long life don’t I?
The thing I left behind once again…
I want to try to re-do it once again…
Let’s try once again.
To make my wish come true,
I’ll continue living,
I want to scream out…
can you hear me?
I won’t make a reason to escape.
…There isn’t a place to go back to…
I’m thankful for your kindness,
that’s why I want to be stronger.
I’m missing the feeling…
so this pain is also welcomed!

Video

For TV size opening in Fullmetal Alchemist

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dPB2Z1wd7WM

For real PV ( Yui )

http://you.video.sina.com.cn/b/26958732-1233430282.html

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It’s a nice song to listen to. The content ,the meaning of the lyrics really suitable to the anime, FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST. It’s best describe the story of this anime, of course especially Edward Elric.
I like the part
“kono omoi wo keshi teshimauniha
mada jinsei nagai desho?
yari nokoshi terukoto
yari naoshi temitaikara “

When first time I heard it ( TV size(the beginning part) ) and I felt that I must download this song, is not bad in my first impression. Then, I listen several times, and now is one of my favorite anime songs.

Last Night in BU with Arios

2009-12-16T19:05:00.000-08:00

11 Dec 2009.
This was my last day in that “little” BU.
That day I gave my time to myself. What to do??

After practice violin a while, I started wonder if I can get some sheet music that I haven’t play before. Initially I wanted to go One Utama, but I decided to go The Curve that side because there got Popular which certainly had what I want. And I got 2 magazines. >.

Then, I started to “lepak” in toy department wanted to find Gundam( either Kyrios or Arios ( own by Allelujah Haptism in Gundam 00) first, the others may be will get it in future). Kyrios I found in Parkson 1U while Arios in Metrojaya The Curve. Arios is more expensive than Kyrios. Both model I also want, after hesitated for sometime, I decided to buy Arios on some factors( one of it was I lazy to walk to 1U, tired already). It cost around RM99.90 with 20% discount(can see how crazy I am). It is the first original Bandai Gundam I have!( Made In Japan, not in China like the model I had before this) Of course there are many different in their quality.

I started assembling Arios at around 7.30pm.

This is the whole box.

Open it.

Ops…it’s written in Japanese…never mind …at least I can understand a bit

Wonder how long will I take to finish it^^

This is the chest part.

Wow…this is the head!! See the eyes!

This is the left arm.

Put the head to the body…upper part is finished!

Take it out…need to be careful …if not it will break

This is the right leg.

This is the pelvis part(I wonder can said like this…)

95% finished!! With the right leg fix to it.

I don’t how to call this…put at the back one… Ah!! This thing had GN Drive inside!!

With these…ARIOS IS COMPLETED!!

These are the weapons of Arios.

These are all the pose of Arios!! See!! SO COOL!! >.<

These are the flight mode!!

It can be a weapon too!! The front part…

Fight with Sandrock , the gundam own by Quatre in Gundam Wing ( the model that I brought, not original, made in China one , quite cheap one)

It finished at around 11pm. Then it took 3 and a half hours to completed!!

I'm so happy to have it!!!

Father's Day

2009-06-21T08:47:00.000-07:00

It's 21st June again, which is known as Father's Day.
I had been not celebrate it for many years, not really can recalled back, perhaps never celebrated before. Even though if I want to celebrate now, it will never has the chance again.
As the EaLD's assignment wanted me to do a poem, I hardly can get an idea other than the strongest feeling that will continue existing in me forever, which is lost the one that you loved. Therefore, I had wrote this poem to him( after several editing).

This poem entitled 'As The Lightning Flashed Across The Dark ' (I don't know to shorten the title, so just take out one of the sentences in the poem.)

You stretched out your robust arms,

when I shattered into pieces.

You carried me on the back,

when I was facing giants in life.

You held me in your arms,

when sorrow struck my heart.

You always had been there for me.

As the lightning flashed across the dark,

It seemed like it happened a night before,

Waited until you came back at midnight,

Watched them helped you changed your clothes,

Took turns to feed you,

Watched you slipped away in the dark parade,

And never walked out from there again.

I know nothing is going to be alright,

But, I know you will look down

On me from above,

always.

I know I can't wrote a good poem because my English really worse than a primary student in the urban area. I know my marks also very terrible if this is the assignment.
But, what I concerned the most is I finally can wrote out one poem about him. I know if I recite the poem to him , he won't be understand what I talk about, even a single word. I think most of my friends or classmates or anyone surround me don't know it and I think they also won't believe it. He actually was uneducated, even a class . But, I think he should be able to understand the sincere and true feeling of his own daughter. I really hope that he would be able to reincarnate to a better life, very far more better than the one's that he gone through , which was so hard for him.

Other than that, I also want to sing for song for him(which now I think is really speak out my heart)(which I also wrote in other blog)

Bye Bye by MARIAH CAREY

I love you always

Persuasive Speech

2009-05-20T01:44:00.000-07:00

Yesterday, my class did the EaLD speech , but my name list is at the bottom , so it can't reached me. But, I was too desperate for get rid of the stress , so I asked for volunteer for did the speech. I need to find a classroom for it and I think it had cause quite a bit troublesome for Ms Chan and Mr Lee also. Mr Lee was because he need to find the empty classroom(German class and not empty at all) for us. For Ms Chan, I felt sorry for her because I saw she was only eat the mee cup to fill her stomach during lunch(time factor) . Sometime, we will think that why so many assignment(especially english) , but why not we think the other way round? As I can see, the lecturers are even more busy marking the over hundreds or thousands of assignments.

Anyway, I had done badly for my speech, I actually expected higher . But, what to do? I wonder I did not did it yesterday, what will be today performance? May be it will be better. But, it had happened already ... ... I can't do any things(unless if I had the time machine(crazy thinking)). Sometime, I feel that I am quite stupid in do the decision. My decisions so far no one time was good. Almost all end with worst ending.

Let's don't care about it first.

This is my speech for the euthanasia:

Good Morning to everyone. Today I would like to talk about euthanasia , it should or should not be legalized in Australia.

As we all know, In 1995, the world's first euthanasia legislation, the Rights of terminally Ill Act 1995, was passed in the Northern Territory of Australia. Four patients died under the Act, using a euthanasia device designed by Dr Philip Nitschke also known as ‘Dr. Death”. The legislation was overturned in 1997 by Australia’s Federal Parliament in 1997.
People around the world are arguing about euthanasia, debate are still going on. I agree that it should not be legalized, as there are some reason in human, moral values and religion teaching.
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Many people support the right of a terminally ill patient to die - but what if the right becomes an obligation?
As an evidence from Holland which active euthanasia is legal there , A recent Dutch government investigation of euthanasia has come up with some disturbing findings. In 1990, 1,030 Dutch patients were killed without their consent.
The Dutch experience seems to demonstrate that the "right to die" can soon turn into an obligation. This concept is dangerous, and you could find yourself the victim if Euthanasia becomes legal in Australia.

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Second , it will become a means of health care cost containment. When some thing is legalized, it certainly will be abused by people. Legalized euthanasia raises the potential for a profoundly dangerous situation in which doctors could find themselves far better off financially if a seriously ill or disabled person "chooses" to die rather than receive long-term care.

"...physician-assisted suicide, if it became widespread, could become a profit-enhancing tool for big HMOs. "

Furthermore, if the government is paying for treatment and care of the patient and they choose to cut off the cost for Savings, they will certainly replace them with the "treatment" of death.

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Many People say that voluntary euthanasia will not lead to involuntary euthanasia. They only look at things as simply black and white. In real life there would be millions of situations where cases and here is one example:
An elderly person in a nursing home, who is illiterate, is asked to sign a form consenting to be killed. In fact they don’t know what is happening? Is this voluntary or involuntary? Will they be protected by the law? Once one signature can sign away a person's life, what can be as strong a protection as the current absolute prohibition on direct killing?

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All human life is valuable and worth living, regardless of state of mind or other quality of life concerns. Many people argue that it is not worth because of the financial burden. But, we can't judge a human life with money. There are still other ways to get the financial support such as donation from the government, the family of the patient, organization and public.

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Saving people are doctors professional roles .What if a doctor say to his patients the only way is die? Some people will doubt that are they try their best to save the patients?
As in The Hippocratic Oath ,“I will give no deadly medicine to any one if asked, nor suggest any such counsel”…In this oath, it obvious that they will not help a patient to die. And there is one more verse , ….

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What if someone stands to inherit one million dollars when their parents dies? Might the heir not find it tempting to nudge them in the direction of accepting a lethal injection?

[Actually here I want to put my stupid idea of my drawing ....but in the end I didn't put, I felt so weird.
Here are two cartoon strips to illustrate this case. Property, money ,company from his father as soon as possible.

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Let’s looked at the stance of religion on the issue of euthanasia.

In Islam, They believe that all human life is sacred because it is given by Allah, and that Allah decides how long each of us will live. Human beings should not interfere in this.

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In buddha, euthanasia is wrong, because it demonstrates that one's mind is in a bad state and that one has allowed physical suffering to cause mental suffering.

Meditation and the proper use of pain killing drugs should enable a person to attain a state where they are not in mental pain, and so no longer contemplate euthanasia or suicide.
Buddhists might also argue that helping to end someone's life is likely to put the helper into a bad mental state, and they do harm to the other people which is not good and they will suffer the consequence when died.

Buddhists regard death as a transition. The deceased person will be reborn to a new life, whose quality will be the result of their karma.The problem is that shortening life interferes with the working out of karma, and alters the karmic balance resulting from the shortened life.

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Christians are mostly against euthanasia. They believe that life is given by God and God has created human beings as in stated in the Bible, Genesis. Since birth and death are part of the life processes which God has created, so we should respect them .therefore no human being has the authority to take the life of any innocent person, even if that person wants to die. It is only God, and God alone, who has the unquestionable power to take life.

There is no support in Scripture for ending the life of an innocent person simply because of sickness, old age, or disease. In fact, God’s Word shows that the weak are to be cared for, not murdered. See 1 Thessalonians 5:14. Beside, as stated in the Bible, one of the ten commandment , “ You must not murder.” Thus, euthanasia can be consider as sin.

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Finally, as we all know, one way of euthanasia is the feeding tube removed. Just imagine, if our beloved one is in the condition."How can we stand by and watch them starve to death? We love and care about them. I cannot walk down the hall knowing I am killing the one that I loved.
Before I end my speech, I only have one sentence to all of you.
If the mind keeps thinking you’ve had enough, but the heart keeps telling you don’t give up
Keep in mind there will be miracle in life. Have Faith.Thank You.
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Anyway, I think I had done my best already, perhaps next time can get a higher mark.

Happy Mothers' Day

2009-05-10T09:50:00.000-07:00

It's finally come to the second week of May, Mothers' Day.

The modern Mother's Day holiday was created by Anna Jarvis, as a day to honor mothers and motherhood; especially within the context of families, and family relationships.

This year mothers' Day I was not able to go back home to celebrate, I felt so sorry. But I had post a card to my mother (although I know that it can't reach in time) at least I had something to my mother. The card is so expensive that I was shocked, as I just took it to cashier. But, I think it should be okay because it worth. It sure will be a joke for my eldest brother as he always laugh at me. But I don't care, I just want to do what I want.

I know that I should treasure my mother by now, every day, every second, every moment .
I will try to do what she want.
I will try to do what she not able to do.
I will try to give her the best that I can.
I will try to not make her dissappointed.

But, I know I had done many things that she don't like me to do.
I' m so sorry for her.
But, I can't talk to her what I had done.
I 'm scared she will be hurt.

I had been so naughty till now.
I had been made the biggest sin in my life.
I can't turn back. I have not chance to turn back, what I can do is continue the journey, the journey that I will never feel meaningful.

What I want to say to my mum is sorry and wish you happy mothers' day.

Korean Food Fair

2009-04-17T01:42:00.000-07:00

I always go to One Utama, because it is so near to my house, 5minutes cycle and walk into the shopping centre. Every time have any special event that I like I will go at least 2 times.

Last time was the Asimo robot, and I answered the question and I got a pen with a tiny Asimo figure as the cap. This time, was Korean Food Fair. I was impressed by the band "Flowers" when they performed the music which were the combination of traditional and modern musical instruments. I like music very much and I had recorded it although I need to lift my hand to hold the camera for almost 20 minutes.

I found that I getting closer to music. More toward classical.

Dinner and 60 Earth Hour

2009-03-28T10:09:00.000-07:00

It's really was a busy day for me(though I everyday also very busy), but I felt that let something different in my life will be interesting. Yes, it was an another memorable day for me.

It's actually was the 60 Earth Hour. My life group leader was invited us to go to have dinner in her house which near by student house. It's actually the new house she and her brother family stay in. This was the first time we went there.

Actually I eaten already but I still wanted to go because I am the type of person don't like to leave out. And I ate a bit because I wanted to try the food she cooked. Overall were quite nice and more feeling like being at home.

When reached 8.30pm, we switched off the light and light up a number of candle . It's just like a romantic dinner ,but actually was not. Anyway this was a different experience.

Later we played a game and it was fun and excited. It was full of laughing and really chilled out. The game using the uno card to play. It's hard to explain using words(perhaps my English not good so I can't explain well.

Even though my homework not yet finish, but I felt I ok with it because I gained a different experience again.

Heaven

2009-03-14T06:55:00.000-07:00

"It's going to be rain soon...".This sentence ran in my mind, but I already promised that I will do One to One with YH. The sky was dark and I quickly cycle to Ikano before YH message me that she reached there. One to one was went on well.

Initially, I wanted to go Tesco to fill up my stocks, but I saw that will reached dinner time soon, so I just ate dinner with YH and one of her friend. They wanted to go to Little Penang to eat,but I don't want because it's expensive(I went before) and I wanted to try something difference. YH then brought us to one of restaurant inside there and said that one quite nice. Yes, it's quite nice. From far I already can heard Jay Chou' s song. Actually is a "ming ge chan ting" (I don't know how to say in English). Frankly, I don't went to this type of restaurant. This was the first time I went. The feelings were extremely good.

The food are not really expensive, I think they 're reasonable price with that condition, and can consider cheap, because other places same price but no songs, musics. The food was nice(may be it's because of the condition, one of my friend said), but I think it's really tasty.

Actually, we reached there around 7pm and finished dinner, then waited for the singers to reach and perform. We waited till 8.30pm, although it's suppose to start from 8pm. But, I think it's really worth to wait. Why? Because it's GREAT ! My friend said that the girl is good at her singing and I just answered "Sure or not? Never mind, we will know it when she sing.Let's discover later."

But, what that I found was extraordinary GOOD ! There is a point, she is look above average(may be) (before she sing). When she started to sing, the voice is very pretty, impressive, lovely, pleasing, appealing, etc. And it's make her so beautiful and gorgeous. And I just can't endure(can't "tahan") , I completely enchanted by her(HOT CHICK?)(no laa...just kidding). There still two more guys sing at there, but one of them is just ok only(impressive he play the something like keyboard but it can sound like electric drum). The other play keyboard and he sing quite well too, but still can't compare with her. I was totally excited and in a very good mood after it. I leave around 9pm and honestly I don' t wanted to leave because I wanted to stay at there to hear the songs. But, I need to go because they fetched me home(my bike left at Ikano, need to pick it up the next day).

Still now I can imagine the pleasing voice and songs rounding at my heart and ears. I still can smile even though I don't know how to do calculus(actually will be very frustrated ) and it' s because or her... ... her voice. If I 'm the one to give marks, I will give "S"... ...(stand for "Sexy"?)(no la) is stand for "Super". I surely will back to the same restaurant and hoping to hear she sing again although it's at night. The restaurant' s name is the title of this post.

I found that I can't live with out MUSIC!!

Met Up with You

2009-03-13T10:08:00.000-07:00

Last Saturday, 7th March, I had another good time here. My friends from TAR College came here to meet with me. Since thay don't know how to go to 1U, then I went to Kelana Jaya to meet them and bring them here.

Even though it's just a while, because one of them was going to have wushu practice.
But, we just have great time of chatting and update each other.

By the way, it's also the first time where I meet up to my friends from my hometown in here, "little" Bandar Utama.

Valentine 's Day

2009-02-14T08:49:00.000-08:00

For most of couple sure will very excited when we talk about this day. It's true that every 14th Feb is special for those who in relationship. Of course I don't know how it' s feel because I never dating before. Some people who are single feel that they are very sad,pity and lonely to went through the special day. But, I won't think and feel like that, really. I feel that we still go through our lives whether single or in relationship. Very things are normal.

What the best for who are single to have a special day on this day to do is to celebrate friendships with a group of friends. This was what I do for this day this year. Honestly, I had a very busy Valentine's Day this year.

The time I woke up was quite late already, and I having my very late breakfast. After that, I met Jaevon and Sarah to go to Tesco( Did the Auntie shopping -.-lll). Actually we were prepared for the celebration of Valentine 's Day in church( life groups). It's really busy that I can't had a proper lunch and rest. After back from Tesco(by cycle, it's really tired), I straight away went to church to prepared for the decoration. Every things were ran quite well, and I drawn for the decoration(the drawings now still at the dancing room in the church!). By the way, Jaevon and Sarah were prepared food. The food were nice, good cook, Jaevon and Sarah(recommended housewives). Of course the decoration were perfect too, good job, Ying Hui.

The games and ice-breaking were good, and at the same time we learn the morals or lessons behind the games, although may be it's only a simple game. Unfortunately, I end up with an injury on my left knee when I played the message transmission game. It's really a nice game, and I really played till I went hyper already. And, this was an important point here, every time that I went hyper or in other words, mad/crazy, there must be something will happened. This time was the injury of course.

I had an extremely good time in (so called) special day. It's one of my most memorable time in my life.

First Time Karaoke

2009-02-13T07:37:00.000-08:00

"Karaoke " I actually quite like, but the things that I haven't sing before today is that I very shy to sing in front of many people. Why?? Of cause of my voice ! Like " Donald Duck" 's voice, very harsh. One more thing was that I thought sing K will very expensive, so I not even gave it a try.

But, my friends invited me to go and I think that they may be won't laugh at me when I sing, so I decide to go. Furthermore, one of them is the member of that place, so will got discount.
When I met them, it' s just very embarrassing, really. They had brought one of their friend that I haven't met before and I have to sing K with them.

Initially, I just sat over there and order lunch to eat and said let them sang first. I just pretend I really hungry and want to eat first but actually not. After some time, they urge me to choose songs. I shy actually and just chose a few songs. I just kept hoping won't so fast reach my turn. But, the time will came.
The first song I sang was Leo Ku's song "bi sha ji". I like his songs and I can sang quite well(ooo..."tak tau malu ad"), just kidding. After this, I just like being charged up and just kept on chose songs. I can imaging that I just went hyper again already.

We had sang quite a long time, about 3 hours, and surprised it's quite cheap.
Actually I just want to continue sang, but it almost reach the time and my friends need to go because they had somethings to do.
I really enjoyed a lot! Thanks for invited me. I think I will get addicted to it.>.<

Firefly

2009-02-09T08:28:00.001-08:00

I went to Kuala Selangor to watch fireflies with my church's friends. It was a quite good to end the "Chap Goh Meh" (the night of the 15th of the first Moon(lunar month)). We all met at Segi College, which consider very large compare to my college. The surrounding was quite nice too.

Anyway, there were a total of seven cars and more than 30 people went ! However, there were two cars got into the wrong way when we went there( I was inside one of the cars). For God's sake, we able to meet the others after about 20 minutes lost. We had a little earlier dinner ( not really) at Kuala Selangor. It made me recalled back when I went to Kuala Kedah to have dinner, it was great time but very much money were gone. However, same that I ate seafood too, I found that Kuala Selangor a bit cheaper than my hometown one. The other important thing was the food were extremely delicious. The view of the sea also nice. Later , we went to the fireflies garden.

Actually, I just brought RM 1 to there. I wanted to withdraw money but the ,machine was dysfunction. So, I ended up with borrowed money for dinner and the ticket for fireflies.

I had a great time enjoying the romantic view of the fireflies by ride in a sampan, although it was quite expensive(in my opinion).

The view from the seafood restaurant at Kuala Selangor.

First Ride

2009-02-07T05:20:00.000-08:00

Actually I very nervous and scared because it was my first time to ride a motorcycle in here, PJ (a big city)and not just like went somewhere around here but was Kuala Lumpur!! I not really can slept before it because I was very worried. But, what to do ? I need to overcome it too because I need to go there to shoot a documentary. The night before was so nervous, not really can slept, but due to too tired, I slept . But there is one thing I don't like, every special event that I need to wake up early I will set the alarm, once I set it I will wake up early than the alarm, although I scare I will overslept. Before 7a.m , I already woke up and I get prepare and Aizat was fetch me to Centrepoint to get the motorcycle and met Matilda. They both are my group members, we only three people, few but have teamwork is enough. I prayed to God because I was scared and prayed for every things was fine and safe during the journey. I think God had answered my prayer and we were safe reach there and without lost. Praise God, Thank God.
(There was only one thing that was Aizat's helmet been stole by somebody else and he need to spend RM 48 to buy a new one.But, of course, the most important was we are safe.)

It was early in the morning, we were ride quite fast(average 70-80km/h) and so cold( luckily I back into house to take my jacket which I had forgot). We planned the interview started 9 a.m, but we reached there quite early. We wanted to started it early but we scared and jumped back into lift when saw a lot of transgender there. Then, we went to the kopitiam in the opposite road to calm down and get prepare. May be this was because of the first time to interview. The second time we went up again and met them and they are friendly and kind too. Anyway, we just interview one person, Miss Sulastri, who is the program coordinator of PT Foundation. She is a friendly and humble person. The interview was going quite well but just some parts we miss it(due to batteries and memories). Hope it won't affect too much on the documentary.

After that, it's almost afternoon and I suggested to travel around Kuala Lumpur because may be I won't have next time for it. It was very hot then, but we still hang around Dataran Merdeka, National Monument, Platinum Negara and National Museum. It was quite fun actually. I like museum so much that I had planned to study archeology before. Anyway, before back, we went to try spaceball. It was scarily, although it's safe to play actually. I just felt that my buttock was out of seat and I turned around in the ball. I felt unsecured and I just frighten that if there was an accident I fall down, so I prayed. I didn't shout even though I scared , may be my voice won't allow me to do that, like " Ahhh...Ahhh..." (imaging in a very low frequency) .

It was a tried day but it was fun.

It's Like That

2009-02-03T04:20:00.000-08:00

When I reached my hometown last Chinese New Year, there are some bad news that they had let me know. I don't want to talk about the others, I just want to tell about one of my most respect, admire and concern teacher. But, I don't mention his name over here. He is a good teacher, of course, kind, generous, care on students and a lot of good personalities. He always talk about life to us, facts, generals issues and religious. He always willing to help when people in trouble. Indeed, he is really kind. But, something unfortunate happened to him. His wife had been run away from home. As I know was because of she had been hex ( I don't sure is this word or not, in hokkien is "Gong Tao"(降頭) ) by a sorcerer ( or wizard, or in Malays is "bomoh" or in Chinese is "神崑" ) and she had followed this sorcerer and leave my teacher with both of his sons. One of his son is just about 2 years old and another is 7 years old.

My friends and I had paid a visit to him during new year. He talked about this to us. He said that he always be a counselor to his friends on their relationship with their life mates.
"But, what had happed now is I, myself, lost my life mate while my friends live happily with each others."
"VERY SILLY."
We all very sympathy to him.
He said that this also was his false, because he didn't noticed early. When he started felt that something had wrong with her and he tracked her. He had saw somethings that he not suppose to see. He later found out that under her pillow had a doll( something like the doll that people used to curse others. ) and some others things that believe had caused their relationship turn worse (in a superstitious view which is quite well-known in Chinese society over here).

"When I realize this, everything was too late, too late for me to solve it. There are nothings that I can do now. So, I let go, let her go. "
His friends advise him to remarriage, so that can help to take care of his children. He don't want, because he don't want to get hurt a second time.

I wonder why. Why people like him who are kind tend to have a lot of unfortunate and difficulties in life? Whereas people who are bad like those who are crime, sell drugs, do illegal business, and many others, tend to have a happy life. They live with luxuries and many lucky things happened to them. They are very wealth and become more wealth again.

There's only unfair in this world. But why the word "fair" still exist? Perhaps those who create this word or the people hope that this word will exist and there will be fair around the world. But, this word will not appear in my own dictionary. Of course there are reasons behind it.

Some people said that this is because of FATE. But why this fate happen to some people but not some others ? Why fate are different? Why people must suffer with fate? Who decide our fates? Who had the will to do it? Why we can't decide it ourselves? Some people said that our lives is depend on our hands. But there are somethings that we don't aspect it to happen but it still happen. Some people said this is because God had arranged for it. Well, if this is the case , I don't know what I need to say, but I think I will accept it even though God are invisible, even though it's really unfair.I believe He exist.

Moreover, in Buddhism, said that certain things happen because there is a cause and there must be a result(因果). Yes, this is most of the cases. But, still somethings that can be explain. The word "transmigration"(輪迴)(of the soul) and "previous life" and "present life" is appear and explain that somethings that happened in the life before ones' death and the cause doesn't had a result yet, then it will result in present life that we live now. Well, I think this is a quite good explanation too and I accept it. This is due to in religious, there is somethings that sciences or facts can't explain it or even demonstrate it. Well, in conclusion, I don't know how to overcome it and even do anythings for it. It's beyond my control, other than I accept it. It's like that.

Sick

2009-01-29T23:04:00.000-08:00

It’s really frustrated that I having a fever now! The next two days(Sunday) I will back to college, and I sick now, then I need to travel back by bus(about 7 to 8 hours), after that LRT, then another LRT to Kelana Jaya. Next, I need to take the taxi back to student house. Some in the ways I need to walk a distant. How I can do that with a weak body and carry a lot of things? It’s really frustrated! Not forget that I still have my homework undone! I totally don’t have the mood to do them. Perhaps back to student house I can finished them. I mind really burl, but still can not sleep well. Always wake up in midnight, sit at the sofa like a still doll, and blank! I realize that I always fall sick when back to hometown. I wonder why it will happen. But it’s true that I having a great time at hometown , gathering, eating and watching. May be I don’t know how to take care of my own body. Pray that I will recover soon.

Forgotten ...

2009-01-21T07:41:00.000-08:00

Today, I ate my lunch at centrepoint. When I wanted to back to college, I stopped by and watched the Chinese trio(traditional musical performance by 3 people) a Chinese lute, dulcimer and flute. I saw nobody watched it, but they still play with full enthusiasm and joy. It's really wonderful. Unfortunately, I had a class after that and I can't watched until the end, I just watched for a few minutes only. I wonder why.

The society now doesn’t really know how to appreciate the traditions leave by the ancestors. What they concern now are all related to materials, in other words, materialism. As we can see now, most of the children speak English, they don’ t know how to speak their mother tongues. It’s seem that they really proud that they can speak fluently, but not in my case. It’s true that we need to master that language, but at the same time, we can not forget our own languages, for they are our roots. We need to preserve and protect our own heritages. So, in my point of view, we need to search for the modern world now and not forget about what we need to keep and protect.

Poetry

2009-01-15T20:20:00.000-08:00

14 Jan.

I suddenly deciced to go to the poetry. I not really want to go because I know that I sure don't know what they talking about!! But, finally I went. May be because of I wanted to hang around and searched for different expericence. Frankly,I really can't understand at all. When everyone was laughing and I just pretend I knew what the joke and laughed. Indeed, very silly.

But later back home was really a great experience. We took the last second LRT back to Kelana Jaya, but we still wait for the others who not catch up with us, they took the last LRT. We still relax then. But when we heard the alarm sounded and we were very nervous, the gates were automatic closing! We still inside! We just rash out from one of the gate, "peu" I think we already out...but still got many gates actually. "woohaaa" I still remember I shout. The gate was already closed half, and we slided out like the action movies,especially "Jackie Chan" .

Think back again, that time I just imaging I was the Heroin in the Resident Evil that when the gates closed me inside, then the zombies , dogs, monsters and all the failure experiments living things will come out and attack me!! And I will take the infinity shotgun, rifle, boom, M-16 ......fight them back!!! But quite scared that I will end up the game with" YOU ARE DIED"...and some bloody scenes. It's really stupid that I will linked the reality to this. But really I just think of this that time, so I knew that I yerd quite loud like a fool. -.-lll

Basketball and Studies

2009-01-13T04:29:00.000-08:00

Long time I didn't play basketball, I think almost 3 years already, I just picked up and play it today. I'm so think fondly of my old friends, the place where we had play the basketball 3 years ago near my house. I just don't want to stop playing it by just now, because I can feel that they all with me at that time even though I play it alone at the court. Although that I had just stress up with many things and of course are problems.

The English lesson was fast, I can't really cope up with it. It really cause a as big as earth problem to me. My English is so poor that I don't know how to do already. All the basic are so mess that I don't know how to write to speak as well.

It is really a problem for me that I just can't understand the classes, App math, Calculus, Chemistry and physics. How I going to do with it????

The Starting Point

2009-01-07T06:24:00.000-08:00

The start of this blog is because of the academic purposes...hope it really can help me in my english as I 'm very poor at it...I think I'm the one lowest in the class. My basic is extremely just like a Primary school 's student. Anyway I am trying out for it. Don't know it work or not. But I just found this time is the most important and I can not catch up with it. This year EALD seem very stressed-out, but if I can get to used to it, I think I will improve a lot. IELTS not achieved the required high score, it may be cause me can't choose the popular universities. I not really like to retake because it take a lot of money , RM 530 not a small amount for my family. But I think I need to pay hard work to get along with my classmate, though I was very lazy -.-lll

I think this year all the lecturers seem kind in my first impression. I hope these will continue until the end of the year. I will try to enjoy every class as well. But there were a lot of homework to do although now is just the beginning of the year, it was hard to believe(this is reality I have to).

This starting week is not good for me as I am very unlucky...since the first step I step into the student house. And I don't want to write them here. For more information please to refer to CO.